A question

Mrs.Fish · 02-20-2004, 10:41 PM

Hi ladies. I hope that someone here can give me some advice about something. My son's school called today at 5:00. She was calling to tell me that my son was not allowed to ride the bus all of next week. The reason for this, you ask? Well, apparently he told a 4th grade girl that she is sexy. David is 7. While I admit that he could have chosen a better way to say it, all he meant was that she is pretty. So, without asking David if that was what he said or anything, he is off of the bus. When I told the teacher that I would have no way to get him there she was like well, he is off of the bus, if you cannot find a ride he will have to stay home. Does that sound right to you? She said that the girls father was going to have sexual harassment charges filed against my son, remember he is 7, if the school did not take him off of the bus. This is not the only trouble we have had on the bus either. The

r has to let David off right in front of my house because he was getting beat up almost daily on the bus or at the bus stop. I am really at my wits end. He is so

because he said that he didn't do anything wrong this time and is in trouble anyway. Any thoughts on this will be greatly appreciated. If nothing else, I fell that the teacher should have told the father that it would be handled on Monday and talked to David first.
Sorry this is so long. I needed to get this off of my chest.
Amy

Bellingsworth · 02-21-2004, 02:32 AM

I think it is very strange that they called and didn't have a written refferal starting the next school day. The big problem is the father. The schools get caught in the middle. Sometimes they don't agree but don't have alot of choice. Is this the first time he has gotten kicked off the bus? Here if a child gets in trouble on the bus they get a warning then one day off, then 3 ect. Who was it that called you? The principal or the teacher?

lulu · 02-21-2004, 05:45 AM

Sometimes public school can really stink!

If I were you, I would take this to the next level. Here in Virginia Beach, the buses are run by a separate division of the school system simply called Transportation. I would call and ask to speak to the transportation supervisor. See if he/she can

. I would also call the school board office and see if they have someone there who can moderate the situation on your behalf. An outside party may get better results. It may come down to you raising a bigger stink than this father did to get some results for your son. And if none of that works, I would consider calling your local legal aid office and find out if they can legally deny transportation from your son to get to school over an incident that only hapenned ONE time, and the FIRST time. I would also go ahead and have your son right an explanation in his own words on a sheet of paper that tells his side of the story. Have that ahead of time so that you have some ammunition of your own to prove there was no harm intended. I would also document every phone call/response you get.

Sorry! That is just my opinion. I get a little

when it comes to my kids. I hate seeing someone getting screwed over! I hope everything turns out well! If you need me, I am here!

Polly · 02-21-2004, 06:00 AM

I agree with the other ladies!! This is absolutely

!! I mean , come on, it was an innocent misuse of a word, not like he brought a knife on or something.I think you need to explore the situation a little more. Maybe even have a mediator meet with you and the father of the little girl, although from the way he over reacted I'm not sure that will

.I think he may be looking for trouble, but maybe something else has happened to his daughter in the past that has made him very wary of all experiences. Your son should not have been kicked off the bus for a whole week. I think somebody heard "lawsuit" and panicked!! What is this world coming to??? It is

the way everyone over reacts to a situation! Good Luck and keep us posted. I will be

ing for you. Hang in there and remember we are here for you!!!

Brad&ScottsMom · 02-21-2004, 09:32 AM

I think it's totally ludicrous. A 7 year old does not know the meaning of sexy. If he had said anarchy, they would have blown him off as not knowing the term. Some people these days really over do it!!!

02-21-2004, 12:54 PM

Most schools do give less time off for first offense. I believe the school should have called you in for a conference with your son, and talked to him about what he said. The father would have reacted differently if it were his daughter saying that word and he would have wanted the opportunity to speak to her first.
Maybe if you had an attorney call the school on your behalf, it bet the school would be responding differently.

Mrs.Fish · 02-22-2004, 11:07 PM

Well, tomorrow starts David's week off of the bus. My dad is going to take him so at least I know that he will get there without getting picked on for a change. My hubby is going to the school and talk with the principal, head teacher and David's teacher and see if this can get all sorted out. Even our Pastor called the other dad "that wacko father". We figure that it would be better for hubby to go because I would most likely be thrown out. This has me so

. Nobody even asked for his side of things. Someone said lawsuit and caused a panic. Isn't it a shame that we live in such a world that at the least little thing somebody wants to sue. Have we taken the term "sexual harassment" too far? What kind of father threatened to have a 7 year old arrested? Hopefully this will all be settled tomorrow.
Thank you all for your support. I knew that I could count on you to

me figure this out and what to do next.
Amy
PS. bellingsworth, it was the head teacher that called me about this. His own teacher did not know of this because I had just talked to her and was told that he was doing well in school. So I am not even sure if the principal knows or what. I am still just so

that I could scream.

Polly · 02-23-2004, 04:04 AM

Amy, I'm glad your husband is going in there to get things straighened out. I hope it works out. It makes me so mad that they did this to your son. You are right, the minute someone says lawsuit they panic and throw good sense right out the door. Your pastor is right too. He is the wackofather. It is pathetic. I am mad for you. I'd like to march in that school and demand to know what they're problem is!!!! I hope everything works out for you and your son. This has got to be so hard for him!!! Let us know how it goes. I am still

ing for you and I really hope it works out and maybe teaches them to think before they react!!! Hang in there, and yes we are always here for you, your friend, Polly

becky · 02-24-2004, 08:40 AM

Amy...

I hope everything works out for you!! I agree with DeeDee that kids 7 and 5 don't even know what sexy means.....and if they do, then something isn't right.

I also agree that a whole week is way too much for a first offense. We get a written notice, then off 1 day, then 3, then permanant. It is very ridiculous.

One thing no one said anything about.......What about the fact that your son is always getting beat up on the bus and at the bus stop? Why isn't somthing being done about that? That to me, is the worse act of the two......He could be seriously hurt!!

Good luck to you!!

swtlissa68 · 02-24-2004, 12:56 PM

I agree with Brad&ScottsMom, I think the schools need to improve with other things than this piddley matter. Yes, you son should be talked to, and let him know that it is not appropiate to say "sexy" that he should have use the term "pretty" but to kick him off the bus and for the father to THINK about pressing charges is ridicoulous!

02-25-2004, 07:08 AM

OMG I would be so mad. I agree with all of you this is

.
my 7yo dosen't know what that means. I think you should talk to the parents of this little girl, with someone else there. There has to be a way around this. will he be counted absent and able to make up the work??

Mrs.Fish · 03-01-2004, 08:50 PM

Thank you all for listening and for letting me know that I was not just being a bit over protective. Well, he only endedup with one day off of the bus and my dad took him for me. The next day a camrea and another adult were put on the bus to find out just what is going on. Since then there hasn't been any trouble. I think that the teacher panicked and once she thought it over she came up with a better solution. So far so good. I guess that our society has just gotten so

y lately over any little thing.
Thank you all for your support.
Amy