WOMEN'S ADS
40-ish.............. 49
Adventurer.......... Slept with all your
Athletic.............No chest
Average looking......Has a face like a basset hound
Beautiful........... Pathological liar
Contagious Smile.... Does a lot of Ecstasy
Educated............ Banged her Poly-sci professor
Emotionally Secure........ Medicated
Feminist............ Fat ball-buster
Free spirit......... Junkie
Friendship first.....slut
Fun..................Annoying
Gentle...............Comatose
Good Listener........Borderline Autistic
New-Age..............It's a mess down there
Old-fashioned....... Lights out, no BJs
Open-minded..........Desperate
Outgoing.............Loud and Embarrassing
Passionate...........Sloppy drunk
Poet......Depressive Schizophrenic Professional...Certified *****
Redhead..............Bad dye-job
Reubenesque..........Grossly Fat
Wants Soulmate...... Stalker
MEN'S ADS
40-ish.............. 52 and looking for 25-yr-old
Athletic............ Watches a lot of NASCAR
Free Spirit..........Banging your sister
Good looking........ Arrogant
Very good looking.......Dumb as a board
Honest.............. Pathological Liar
Likes to cuddle........ Insecure mama's boy
Mature.............. Older than your father
Physically fit......... Does a lot of 12-ounce curls
Very sensitive......... Gay
Spiritual.............. Got laid in a cemetery once
Thoughtful.......... Says "Excuse me" when he farts
Marilyn
----Summerwaters .gif "groovy")
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